Jeff Ferris


Jeff knows a lot about rods

D.O.B. - 21st November, 1970

Home Town - Janesville, WI

Profession - Skateboarder

Qualification - Jeff skates for money, which is cool, but he also writes, produces and acts in theatrical plays, travelling as far as Edinburgh to perform them. Jeff's Pro Impact Stunt Team headed the Got milk? Gravity Tour and, while all this was going on, Jeff still had time to discover a completely new kind of UFO called Rods, which you can read more about here.

Jeff Fahey

Jeff

D.O.B. - 29th November, 1952

Home Town - Olean, NY

Profession - Actor

Qualification - Best known for his portrayal of Jobe Smith in The Lawnmower Man, Jeff is a versatile actor, capable of playing characters with, and without, hair. In his younger days, Jeff once hitch-hiked from New York to Alaska and lived in a kibbutz in Israel. Jeff also appeared in Miami Vice (TV show, not film), he was the gun runner who blew up their ferrari with a missile launcher. When Jeff Fahey tells you to move your car, don't start with the "Do you know who I am? I'm Don fucking Johnson!" bullshit.

Jeff Eugenides

Jeff's pretty cool once you get to know him...


... and he's like, fuck it, I'm a wizard

D.O.B. - 8th March, 1960

Home Town - Detroit, MI

Profession - Author

Qualification - Jeff wrote The Virgin Suicides and then his second novel, Middlesex, won a little thing called the Pulitzer prize. Maybe you've heard of it? He also briefly worked alongside Mother Teresa in India because, you know, he had a week off and she needed a hand (this story is 100% true).

Jeff East

Super Jeff!

D.O.B. - 27th October, 1957

Home Town - St. Louis, MO

Profession - Real Estate Agent

Qualification - Before he turned his awesome Jeff powers to the field of real estate, Jeff played the young Clark Kent in the Superman movie (See Jeff Atcheson). Superman was a Jeff. Unsurprisingly. Jeff was the cool Superman who used his powers to run after trains and pick up chicks. Jeff is also still living, he even has the full use of his legs which puts him at least two up on Reeve. Jeff also played Chris in classic schlock horror Pumpkinhead (also starring Lance Henriksen, who loves the Jeffs (See Jeff Doucette)).

Jeff Dunham

Like the arrow says

Profession - Ventriloquist

Qualification - The only person ever to win the Ventriloquist of the Year award twice, Jeff has also appeared on The Tonight Show more times than any other ventriloquist. Once again, Jeff, field, greatest therein. Mohammed Ali can't make a puppet talk and tell jokes. As far as I know.

OK, he did this thing for his daughter's birthday once with a sock puppet but you could totally see his lips move and it wasn't that funny.

OK, it was kind of funny, but it wasn't really sock puppet so much as it was a sock, from his foot, like, five minutes before he did the bit. And it smelt noticeably of feet.

Boxer's feet.

Jeff Dowd

Dude

D.O.B. - 20th November, 1949

Home Town - Seattle, WA

Profession - Writer/Producer

Qualification - Jeff was the primary inspiration for the character Jeff 'The Dude' Lebowski, although he is far from a lazy man. In his work as an independent film producer, he has helped raise over $28 million for indie movies. Jeff was on the board of the Sundance film festival, he totally knows Redford. He was a member of the Seattle Seven, that was him... and six other guys, but he didn't write the Port Huron Statement. Jeff has a myspace and you should totally add him as your friend.

Jeff abides.

Jeff Doucette

Jeff

D.O.B. - 1947

Home Town - Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Profession - Actor

Qualification - Jeff played Jeremy Wilkes in top-notch schlock horror The Dentist 2 and the janitor in The Mangler 2 (which has Lance Henriksen in it, and he's a real actor that people have heard of (that's "of whom people have heard", for those of you that don't speak bad-grammar)). Jeff was also the voice of Smeck in God, the Devil and Bob, which was a really good show, but it mentioned God, ergo it was blasphemous and it was cancelled pretty quickly because it didn't play well in the south.